17 February 2020

Dates with a younger guy

After an incident last year when a guy started playing a computer game on his phone after sex - I sort of gave myself a minimum age of 27 for dating a guy ...

The trouble is that lots of beautiful 25 year olds keep appearing on dating apps ...

And whilst they aren't normally interested in me ... one guy recently was ...

The first date was excellent - about four hours later we finally said goodbye ...

The second date was pretty good too.  Although his insistence that we not have sex until we had dated more left me wondering when it would actually happen.

The third date went pretty well too - by this stage he had his hand inside my trousers whilst we were in a pub !  In hindsight it felt a bit odd that I didn't manage to get hold of his bits, but he got to play with mine ... whilst still saying that we couldn't have sex !

Towards the end of the date, he asked me a specific question about my recent sexual history, which I declined to answer ... and this is where things fell apart.  We parted on reasonable terms ... but in text messages afterwards it felt like he was threatening me that if I didn't answer the question, then we couldn't meet again.

Quite a few of his messages were laced with "micro aggresions" - i'm not sure if they were designed to put me on the back foot, or whether he was using it as a way of protecting himself from his own insecurities.  Whatever the reason, it was annoying.

We met up for a fourth time, and the coldness between us was a bit shocking in comparison to the previous three dates.  It was incredible that the excitement could have been drained so comprehensively.  I told him that I didn't think there was any future, and whilst he protested a bit, I think he knew that it was over.


My lessons from this experience are

i) Try and keep to late 20s and above
ii) Guys who have such a limited sex life are probably not compatible
iii) Guys who are adament about a monogamous relationship, maybe aren't compatible
iv) Don't accept micro aggressions / high mainteance guys as being ok
v) Don't give up on the idea of a relationship


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